Assessment

Folks, I am SO busy right now that I hope to eventually catch up with Project 365. I have been taking a lot photos; it's just a matter of having a moment to BREATHE in order to post them.

I realized that I needed some time to ASSESS the thangs going on in my life. This has been on my mind all week, but I've been too swamped to truly sit down and compose this. I wanted to write it this morning, but it's been Grand Central Station here today:

* I am so tired of allowing folks who are crazy as all HELL to gravitate towards me as if I am a "velcro strap" and they are "lint." Case in point - I had someone drop some materials off to my residence this AM. I was talking about how diverse today's students are - race; ethnicity; education; religion; sexuality. This FOOL said, "Blacks and Hispanics can be gay? REALLY???
WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? I couldn't wait until I got in the house so that I could scrub my hands (since I shook his). This is up there with a bus driver last week nearly passing out in shock when he realized that I was black. I was sitting behind him talking about the quality of education in the state of AZ; he was impressed that I had a doctorate, etc. . . When he got up to help a wheelchair-bound patron board the bus, he said, "WOW, I thought that I was having a conversation with a white woman this entire time." Lordy, I am just so articulate.

Deliver me.

* Strange-ass women and menfolk. I know my fair share of them. A dear friend and I were discussing this recently. Indeed, we are some peculiar creatures, and for some odd reason, these damn folks manage to find me. I have befriended the wealthy, the poor, the weak, the "I grew up battered, but made it, but want to batter myself more so that I can continue to wallow in pity either because I enjoy how pity feels from others, or I am too messed up in the head to try and climb out of hell (you ain't a Lifetime Movie Network star; save that for Melissa Gilbert. Therefore, WAKE UP!!!)," the educated, the uneducated, the PARANOID, the "I am married and allegedly have my shit together/I am single, but I am confident in myself." To make a long story short, in this mix, I have met some outstanding women and menfolk, but I have also met some that make me want to scream, "What damn planet are you from?"

I don't have a lot of friends; the ones that I have are messed up, but you know what? They are real, and I fully embrace that. They don't play any Mickey-Mouse ass games, and they aren't fairweather. I thought about that this week. They are the ones that consistently and genuinely contact me when I've gone "ghost," am sick, or just have this "vibe" that I need to talk.

God has been talking to me about this for the past 1.5 months. It's been really heavy on my heart for the past two weeks. God, I am taking heed of your whispers; they are not being ignored. Close necessary doors; put up road block signs, and guide me along new paths.

We as women and men hate. We need to cut that mess OUT. I've been feeling this way for quite some time with the people that I interact with on a week-to-week basis. Envy is a monster. My motto is, "Let my confidence allow you to work on some things that may irk you about yourself. If you have to use me as motivation, do so. Don't hate. Life is just too short."


* Rush Limbaugh needs to SET HIS ASS DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ditto for those who have nothing else to criticize Obama on, except for him "exposing" his shirtsleeves. Can't a man let his pits BREATHE?!?! Y'all know that his deodorant is probably working OT.

* Folks who don't mean you a dang bit of good. I have been projecting a vibe of, "If you don't mean me a bit of good, and you have to "force" yourself to speak to me, keep on stepping."

* Give and God will bless you. I was so proud of my true commitment to tithing in '08. I hope to give 20% more this upcoming year.

Peace