Hola!
Although I *allegedly* have a firm command of the English language (according to the letters behind my last name, which at times I have given the finger to, especially when my folks, who have NO letters behind their name (particularly my jewelry-selling Daddy) make more $$$ than I do with their h.s. diplomas), when the situation calls for slang, I am happy to oblige.
PEOPLE STANK AND THEY KEEP SOME STANKY CRIBS.
Got that? In case your Ebonics is subpar, that translates to: There are a significant number of individuals who probably fail to wash their bodies adequately. These same prototypes are conditioned to being filthy, and are more prone to keep a dirty residence (and, you wonder why my students cussed me out on a daily basis RE: my vocabulary?).
Today, my realtor took me to see two homes in AHWATUKEE (where I currently reside). Praytell how you can have a $300K home (the amt. that you paid for the darn thing) and live in filth? At one time, the owners were able to meet their mortgage payment. Now, the bank has taken over the residence. Folks, that house STANKED. The carpets and bathrooms - - - where do I even begin? The yard is a fire hazard. Their grass is HAY. Hell, a horse would even reject that grass. Now, if I could take out the full amt. for my loan, I could turn that house into a masterpiece. However, I would end up spending a big chunk of that $$$ just de-funking that place. Hell, I had to keep sniffing inside my shirt (inhaling my favorite perfume, Bvlgari) just to keep from passing out. I've seen individuals living GHETTOFABU lives living cleaner than that. What is WRONG with people? This is the one that I don't get for the life of me - - - if you grew up in a clean house, what causes you to stop being clean once you get your own crib? Even if you had to clean up as a kid and resented it, does that mean as an adult you reject cleanliness?!?!?!
Deliver me.
I'm not even *going there* with the 2nd home. Needless to say, I was afraid to go upstairs; I wouldn't have returned. *Something* would have made me its dinner. When I returned to my complex, I went to the leasing office. Some guest was FUNKING up the place. He needed to be hosed down outside. LORD.
This has prompted me to now go and clean up my tidy place.
Miz A., get up off the FLO. ;)
7 comments:
Bleach- 2.00
Paper towels-1.00
Bottle of febreze- 3.00
My kid to cut your lawn-12.00
Gas to get all this shiznick- 900.00 a gallon
A realtor selling your house- Priceless!
Wow! How do people live like that! Imma go clean now :)
It's a bona-fide WELLNESS issue. How do you live in utter FUNK?!?!?! Don't you realize that your place STANK?!?!?! You aren't that depressed to recognize Eau du FUNK!!!!!!!!!
GIRLLLLLLLLL, you CRAZY. I only saw the 2nd half of your post right away.
You broke it DOWN. I LUV the gas comment.
Now, these same TWISTED folks will have the nerve to have a $400 Coach bag that they place on their nasty ole' countertop every night.
In case your Ebonics is subpar, that translates to: There are a significant number of individuals who probably fail to wash their bodies adequately.
That did it for me lol.
Girl, you'll have to forward this link to someone. Now, you've got me ROLLING. I sounded like the "Articulated Colored Man" from "In Living Color"!!!!
Oh my goodness you are crazy funny!
Ms. Rican:
I TRY!!! It's haaaaard out here for a sista. I just try and add a tad bit a humor in my life just to keep from crying.
Thanks for stopping by! Come on back now, hear?
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